When I was like 21 years old, I had met my kids' father's friends...and one being a real gentleman. Of course we all were partying people...you know, the type that would drink alcohol, and smoke cigs or pot.
Anyway, I do remember many of the friends and some have been mine as well, but we had fallen out of touch because maybe we moved away or they moved away and I no longer went to deaf social events in the Detroit area. It didn't appeal too much to me, when I became a mom. I remember one deaf man who complimented the change in me, "You have 'mother eyes' now..." meaning the person I became was no longer who they knew. I changed to become a mother, and to be the best mother I could be. And start straightening my life out.
Fast forward to 20 years later (around 20 years later), a deaf couple visited our church today. The wife has cancer and was not doing well. She was feeling well enough to come to church. Even though she has to tote around her pain-killer machine and click for a dose nearly every half hour...to control the pain. Her husband was very caring and watching over her frequently.
In Sunday School, the lesson was so interesting for the husband, that a few times I'd let him know his wife's cup was ready to slip out of her hands (she had been nodding off frequently due to the meds) or about to fall out the side of her chair.
There was a fundraiser spaghetti dinner so we all hung for that after SS. While conversing with the wife, she asked me if I knew this person or that (a very long list, and maybe 3 out of 20, I do know)...finally I asked if they knew the kids' father and his family. The husband said yes! And told me he remembers visiting me at an apartment I lived in (the house in apartment upstairs, living over a guy who had rottweilers)...I looked at him and he said, think of me really skinny! I finally remembered him!!! Talk about small world.
We proceeded to talk a while, then I asked the husband how HE is doing, taking care of his wife, and how can we help him, how can I help him? He wanted to focus on his wife, and I told him I understood that very clearly. I understand her fears and not wanting to die, which is perfectly normal. How can we help them? So that is something to think about.
Later he and wife let me share little bit, sharing that I have experience with caring for people with cancer, so I know exactly what they're going through. So if they ever need to talk, or want me cook a meal or whatever, just let me know. I know where they live, and I'd be more than happy to come by or whatever.
I do pray for them, because I know it is hard for the husband to handle all that. Very stressful. Believe me, I know what he's feeling. I was so happy for the wife and she was so thrilled to have met me, finally knowing who I really am...and getting reacquainted. The best part was getting hugged, and being thanked for finally getting to meet me in person.
Ahh...today surely was a good day. The wife first had lung cancer, got treated for that, and it cleared. Then she developed a brain tumor, and treated with radiation, that was treated. Now, she has a tumor on her spine. If they operate, too risky, a high risk of becoming paralyzed. What did she want to do? She chose no surgery. She will continue to fight it off.
Now she leaves it in God's hands, however, the human part of her would like to live longer to see her children marry and possibly have children. But, it is up to God. I'd love for her to be able to see her children marry. She is only 3 years older than me. I do admire her determination. And her strong spirit.
No comments:
Post a Comment